In a moment of weakness, I began thinking of some of the government officials who just seem to roll over to every whim and wish of the eco groups.

I got to thinking that we all have our own agendas, I know I do, but as government employees, many of them go beyond what is moral, and sometimes even legal (remember the Lynx hair plantings?).  The weakness came about because I started feeling sorry for these people, and trying to justify their 'end fits the means' thinking.

Luckily, I was jarred out of this thinking quickly.  What jarred me was, I somehow focused on the phrase 'rolled over', and how dog-like and pavlovian these people can be.

I need to state right now, clearly and succinctly, that I, in no way, wish to malign any dog, living or dead.

These people have been 'trained' by those who hold power over them.  As to what that power is, it could be anything, and for the purpose of this discussion, does not matter.

What I'm suggesting is that we begin a training program of our own.

What if, instead of jumping all over these sell out government employees whenever they roll over to some unnamed eco group, we found something to praise them for?

At first, it may be just emailing them to compliment about their nice font used in a press release.  As time goes by, with a few emails getting complimented, they will begin to want to please their new found friends.

After a few weeks, things could get more personal.  Feel free to compliment them on font usage in public, after meetings etc.

This will take a little longer, but after continued use of the personal compliments, we will begin to see a change in the governmental mongrels thinking.

This next point is the important one, and anyone wishing to take place in the training exercises should either take notes, or clip this column out of the paper and keep it in their wallet for reference.

The mongrels will begin telling the truth at some point.  It may be just a sentence at first, or even a few words, but remember their exact usage.  Compliment the subject, especially in public after meeting.  Feel free to even give them a pat on the head or a rub behind the ears as you say, "Good boy, you told the truth, good boy (or girl)". 

Trust me on this one, the combined feeling of telling the truth and being freed from their lives of lies will feel wonderful to them. 

They will begin to revel in their new found popularity.  After a compliment, you will notice their tongues hanging out slightly, waiting for another compliment or head pat.

Suddenly, many will simply begin telling the truth in their business dealings.
Life would quickly become better for everyone.

At that point, we've got em.

It's just a short step away from that final command we will learn to give.

"Good boy, now get me a beer!"

 

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